while i was reading your message, i felt like there's a calm and reflective command ka ng situation mo. barely holding on, but still holding on--and that's what matters. don't lose that grip. grip tighter instead. hindi ka na yung pagalit na tao sa buhay. steeg.

i don't know how to feel exactly the depth of your situation, 'cause i always have had (did i use "have had" right?) a family to count on. but heto ako at nakikiramay. tol, no suicide lang--kahit mental suicide, NO.

let your past mistakes be what they are--PAST MISTAKES. every one makes mistakes. you learn from them instead. but you don't quit on the job you've always wanted (a journalist, a media man). parang dun sa grey's anatomy episode na napanuod ko. Dr. Izzie Stevens killed a cardiothorasic patient because she did something wrong. and then she quit, right away. days after her quitting, her one superior, Dr. Richard Webber, told her, "During my first year at this hospital, i killed my very first patient, who had a lung complication. i felt so wrong he died because of me. i wanted to quit, really. but for some reason, i didn't. twenty five four forward, i am now the Chief Surgeon of Seattle Grace hospital. i know it sounds wrong that i killed my first patient and now i am a Chief Surgeon, but my point is Dr. Stevens, you DO NOT quit. yes, i made a mistake. but i learned well from it. and i did not abandon the profession that i always wanted. i strived to rise. because of that mistake, i was able and still saving hundred of lives, which i could not have done so if i quit."

haha, medyo natatandaan ko pa yung scene na yun sa season 2.

at tama yung nakausap mong chick (maganda ba?). you create your life based on what you have or don't have. just hang on in there.

My friend JP graduating summa cum laude in art school in the U.S.